American Girl

She waits another week to fall apart...

If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. ~ Thomas Paine

Questions....

 

1) Do you guys have ANY idea how much I miss you?

 

2) Suppose that, hypothetically, there's an office.  And in this office work people with all kinds of views on, say...politics.  And in this office there is a common area right smack in the middle for people to gather and eat lunch, where they debate said differing views to the point that it begins to create a hostile enviroment for all, including those who have no choice but to overhear them, even as they work through lunch at their desks.   Would it be appropriate for a manager to nix all political talk within the four walls of the office, or would that infringe on people's right to free speech, even though said manager seriously doubts that this is what our forefathers had in mind when they decided there should be a right to free speech?

 

3) Suppose someone confides in you that she's won the "Nigerian Lottery", which, for the record, she has never entered.  Are you obligated, morally or otherwise, to insist to her that it is a scam? 

 

4) Suppose that a person may be the subject of a background check by the F.B.I.  Not that this person has done anything wrong, mind you...just suppose it's a possibility.  Hypothetically.  Would or could a background check by the F.B.I. include the reading of a person's publicly published blog?  Does the F.B.I. know we have blogs?  Has it come to that?  Just wondering.

 

5) Have I mentioned how much I miss you guys? xoxoxox

 

posted by: AmericanGirl at 14:42 | link | comments (15) |

Whooo boy, did I ever screw up.  What on Earth was I thinking, leaving the confines of my cozy little house and entering the world filled with all those, those....people?

 

For one thing, I spent a month convincing myself that Hope would be fine - better off, even, if I went back to work.  She's in good hands, she's great.  And this morning she woke up and made some noise so I went to her room and her hair was messy.  Hello?  When did she get hair?  When was there enough of it to mess?  She's got hair and teeth and if THAT'S not enough - you know... you carry your child for nine months.  You fret over everything that goes into your mouth, every activity that you do, and some things you don't do.  You go through agony to bring them into this world, carry the actual physical scar from where they cut her right out of your body, limp around for a while, go through hormone hell, get up a zillion times at hours no well mannered person would keep, change thousands of diapers, fend off every single wave of real or imagined danger that may or may not face your darling baby, because you are her mother, and no one else is her mother so you do all this without another thought, and what's the thanks you get?  One day she opens her mouth and instead of a rasberry or a burp or something getting shoved in there or any of that other usual stuff, you get "Da-Da!"

 

SO not fair.

 

Not to take away from the fathers of the world, but seriously, let's face it.  When it comes to baby making, they have the easy part.  Just try and debate that.

 

I did have a point when I started typing. Oh yes, that's right...Of course Hope is fine and happy and great.  But I'm not fine.  I'm not even anything remotely close to resembling fine.  I missing everything!  I think I've seen my husband for a grand total of 5 hours this week, and half of those were in a semi-conscious state.  (Mine, not his)  I leave for work in the dark, I come home in the dark, and 4 out of 5 days, Hope has been asleep when I leave and back asleep for the night by the time I got home.  That's four whole days of her life that I missed.

 

I don't know why I thought it would be any different.  There's absolutely no reason in the world that I should have assumed it would be any different, but I did.

 

I might be able to justify it if the work was rewarding and wondering.  I've been at my new position for one week and already I'm drowning.  These aforementioned people  (shudder) - They copy me on every single email they send.  Every person in my office copies me on every single email.  Even if that email just says something to the effect of "Ok" or "Thank you!" or "I'll get back to you on that."  Holy CRAP!  I don't want them!  I can't even get to my own work because I have to wade through 197 "Thank you" emails every morning.  Don't even get me started on the paper.  Oooooh, the paper.  And the receptionist, who is now my assistant, who cries every single day about some nonsense, and then comes and sits in my chair, sinks down, puts in her best Eeyore voice, and says "It's ok if you want to fire me.  I understand."

 

Fire her??  Mark my words, I'm going to KILL her.  I'm going to tie her to that stupid chair and light her on fire and the flame will be fed with all of the useless printouts of other people's work that they insist on CCing me on.

 

Oops.  I was kidding about that last paragraph.  I guess.  I realize it's only been one week.  But if Hope can get hair and teeth and words in one week, what in the world am I going to miss in a month, a year, a career?  I'm no quitter, but...wait a minute, yes I am!  And why shouldn't I be?  Isn't life too short to do anything that makes you feel completely and utterly miserable?  Isn't it??

posted by: AmericanGirl at 23:00 | link | comments (12) |

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