American Girl

She waits another week to fall apart...

About me

American girls are weather and noise....

If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. ~ Thomas Paine

I'm not in Brooklyn.  Mostly because Ryan begged me not to go by myself.  Meeting people there - very capable non-pregnant people, did nothing to sway him.  This launches a discussion - or at least a thought process, that he wouldn't have stopped me if it were just me.  Is the sudden overprotectiveness during pregnancy due to the fact that they think you'll be unable to defend yourself while in such a delicate condition, or because they love the baby more than you?  (Irrational pregnancy fear #7,325 - There are so many of them!)  The truth is, I've been afraid of Metrotech since I worked in banking years ago, and he knows that.  The real truth is, I probably wanted him to talk me out of it in the first place.  Girls are weird.  In the absence of playing hookie, I shall waste time by blogging.  A not so silent protest.

Irrational pregnancy fear #7,326 - The "Best Odds Diet".  Have you ever heard of such a thing?  There's this famous book called "What to Expect When You're Expecting".  It's like the bible of pregnancy, or so I'm told.  So I figure I have to read it.  The pregnant people on the message board I read for giggles quote from it all the time.  A valuable resource, right?  So I was reading it yesterday, and I got to the part about the diet, which is named because in theory, following it gives your baby the best odds for a healthy life.  (You can sense the guilt that's built into the name, right?)

The diet basically consists of leafy green vegetables, lean broiled chicken breast, something called "Power-Packed Oatmeal" (They provide the recipe) and skim milk.  There's a little more to it, but not much.  Just as I was thinking "They CAN'T be serious", I see a little parapgraph titled "Best Odds Cheating".  So whew - of course they don't expect you to follow this insane diet, right?  Not when you're actually craving unmentionables?

And I quote:

"The Best-Odds Diet recognizes that all of us slip up-Really need to slip up- Every once in a while.  To eliminate guilt, the diet allows for cheating.  So once a week give in to something that is not quite perfect but not totally terrible:  a bagel, some bread, or pancakes made with refined flour; frozen yogurt or ice milk made with sugar; a bran or whole grain muffin made with sugar or honey.  Once a month, treat yourself to something terribly wicked:  a slice of cake or pie; an ice-cream sundae; a candy bar.  And don't cheat at all if you find that you can't stop once you get started."

Are they kidding??  Having some bread is "cheating"??  A whole grain muffin?  I've decided that this book is not actually a pregnancy guide, but propaganda.  It's birth control.  Either that or, maybe my poor baby is doomed, and I'm "terribly wicked". 

posted by: AmericanGirl at 13:55 | link | comments (9) |

Comments:

#1  17 May 2005 - 14:06

 

This sounds like the worst diet plan ever. Cheating ONCE A WEEK??? When you're having the strongest and weirdest food cravings EVER??? Pardon me, but their cheating suggestions sound like healthy eating to me. So they suggest REAL cheat items as ONCE A MONTH. I'm sorry, but if I were limited to one sweet thing, once a month, I would binge like nobody's business. So, according to their plan, I wouldn't even be allowed that.

I think babies deserve moms who aren't unhinged by stupid, unrealistic, BORING diets. You only get one life. Kids are amazingly resilient. I'm sure your child can handle a mom with a normal diet. Even one with the occasional puke-flavored jelly bean ; P

InMyLife

#2  17 May 2005 - 14:07

 

Oh, yes, girls ARE weird. And contradictory. We're allowed. When men have to pass babies out their bodies, then they will be allowed.

InMyLife

#3  17 May 2005 - 14:37

 

Just for the record, the women at the doula workshop didn't like that book at all.

Leigh

#4  17 May 2005 - 17:30

 

Leigh, that is so good to hear. The more I read it, the more guilty I feel. Then there's that entire chapter on "When something goes wrong" - which I am totally trying to avoid hearing about these days. Bad book.

AmericanGirl

#5  19 May 2005 - 16:11

 

Ugh ... books like that are bad for babies. I do have one warning:

Apparently, vodka shots may turn your baby into a lawyer ... and perhaps even a blogger. You've been warned.

As for baby books, here is my suggestion ... at the very least, you'll have fun reading it (I'm a fan of the author for, believe it or not, her terrific sense of humor).

Jheka

#6  19 May 2005 - 16:30

 

If vodka shots turn your baby into a lawyer/blogger, I don't even want to know what green beer does. :(

Thanks for the book suggestion. Thank goodness she has a great sense of humor, ugly as she is. :P

AmericanGirl

#7  19 May 2005 - 21:04

 

Yeah, her poor husband must be a saint ... or maybe blind ...

Jheka

#8  24 May 2005 - 21:10

 

you're not supposed to read the 'when something goes wrong' chapter. It says so right at the beginning!

ButterflyLane

#9  24 May 2005 - 21:20

 

Well, it says don't read it unless you have a reason to think something's wrong. Isn't that a given? Of course I think something's wrong. Until my baby can come out and say "Hey mom, I'm fine!" I'll worry that something's wrong. :D

AmericanGirl

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